and u thought vodafone was the new 911…

ok! Its been a while and here i am back with another interesting observation. The recently launched ad campaign of vodafone has an impressive tagline “happy to help”. Now most of you would love the ad, where a pug fetched everything you need and that without even being told. But WAIT! Thats a pug! And the vodafone guys arent dogs! How dare you abuse them, they are at your service. This time they are ready with a proof that they are “really” (!) helpful. The guys at the vodafone store now wear badges with (yes u got it!) “happy to help” beautifully inscribed. Now how we wish that their mind was as beautiful as the ad or the pug (gosh! dogs are way much better). Anyway, the new “helpful” experience of vodafone involves the badged guys to keep helping you with the same smile u saw on flight # IC 814…oh shit! No that was the one that was hijacked and taken to kandahar…oops! The same smile u saw on the recent spice jet flight!

Well, I have another incident to share, i sent vodafone an email stating a few issues i had with them, and within seconds (I was totally awed then) i got a reply…voila! But my joy was extremely short lived when i found out that it was an automatically generated response system, that acknowledges your mail. But whats interesting is they had 2 attachments with that mail and both of them were Vodafone logos. CAn u beat that! I mean i am frustrated here because i cant reach your customer support through fone and write a mail to you and i am being thrown back more vodafone publicity material. This company has some audacity!

Now, i would still not have written this, but i happened to send an email to some european ISP. What immediately followed was anticipated, an automatically generated email, but this time there was a slight difference. It had a complaint reference no. on it. Guys! This is what i call accountability. (learn something VODAFONE). well, the mail asked me to wait for the reply to my problem within the next 24 working hours. I waited and the europeans were not to disappoint me. I got a mail, specifically written for my problem and was NOT a computer message. Someone actually read it and replied!

This is where the difference lies and by the way, if you are still wondering what happened after i received the automatic email from vodafone, well nothing! I am to this day waiting for their reply (which by the way was promised to me within the subsequent 48 hours…huh)  2 months after the due date! they for sure are HAPPY TO HELP..perhaps just a little too happy i guess!

The real TATA Sky

The “isko laga dala, toh life jhinga lala” theme has begun to ring high in my ears, thinking that I was truly missing the deal of a life time, and with the 4 digits ( 1499) staring my face on my TV screen, i decided to end the intimidation. A call to the TATA Sky helpline followed and what came out were facts that otherwise lie hidden deep inside (like one of your perverted fantasies)

So, the first shock was an obvious one the 1499 tagline is just an alluring figure. You need to add a 1000 bucks to it for installation cum 12 months warranty. That makes it 2500 and you are already sweating. Wait for more, the warranty conveniently mentions 12 months which not so implicitly implies a follow up. A follow up costs you 600 bucks a year, adding 50 bucks to your monthly cable budget. Besides a shift of residence means you shelling out 600 bucks more. Simply put your monthly bill considering you choose the cheapest no-frills package is 300. Not to mention the one time payment of 2500, and you were thinking the TATA name was giving you another NANO…well…not quite!

So the next time your cable wallah goes for a hike, don’t lose your cool as he is still on your side, giving you a much better deal! CAS be damned!

Average vs Marginal

I couldn’t have found a better example to clearly distinguish the two concepts. I shall take up productivity as the theme here. First the boring part, the definitions (aaaaaah, i know you guys hate it as much as i do). Average productivity is simply total quantity divided by the total quantity of input; whereas Marginal productivity means output that results from one additional unit of a factor of production.

Now why i am writing this exactly 38 hours prior to my last exam shall  become clear when i delve into explaining the difference between some of my more “sincere” (i am trying hard here) classmates and my humble self ( ! ). Coming straight to the point, i am a marginal worker working as close to the test as human possibilities would permit, and trust me, most of us underestimate ourselves. So while i start studying 2 days prior to my test, most of my classmates (the ones u must have met at some point in your life) are usually beginning their umpteenth round of revision. They are the ones who work on the principles of average productivity. Now don’t get me wrong here. I don’t intend to demean them in any way. I have enormous respect for them as they can do something i can’t. But hell guys, there’s more to life than just working away with your textbooks. There’s something called “free thinking”. A greater part of those average workers are devoid of that primarily because they are busy realizing their average values (rising output, but also the amount of time put in).

Marginal workers are in an advantageous position for 2 basic reasons. Marginal is a quickie version of average with negligible difference in performance (output, if Adam Smith is too heavy on you). So, in times of distress its the average worker who shall panic as the marginal has hitherto been accustomed to be working at the margin. The so called panic is routine for him and he is closer to knowing the powers of the human mind. Secondly, the marginal worker is left with ample time to devote to the other more interesting things of life.

So its time you got your lessons right, Try marginal work ethos and experience the limitless potential of your mind.